My daughter dresses like a boy and it makes me want to cry: Lesbian mom's anguish over her little girl's refusal to wear dresses

A mother whose daughter would rather wear dark blue skinny jeans and a Tyrannasaurus Rex T-shirt than a dress, has opened up about her distress at the eight-year-old's rejection of all things pink.
Vikki Reich from Minneapolis reveals how her little girl, Zeca, is 'often mistaken for a boy' in a candid essay for the Huffington Post.
Though she wishes she could 'feel proud' at her daughter's confidence and conviction with the way she dresses, the contributing editor at Lesbian Family says it makes her want to cry.

Style transition: Although Zeca used to love wearing dresses (left), her style changed around her fifth birthday and three years later, she is now 'often mistaken for a boy' while wearing her older brother's clothes (right)

'My daughter is not a princess,' she writes. 'She hates pink. She doesn’t like things that sparkle and has no interest in dresses or skirts, in flowers and lace.
'She covers her messy, short, brown hair with a black and gray stocking cap and her favorite shoes are high tops that are a vibrant mix of black, blue, yellow and orange.'

It was on the day of Zeca's kindergarten picture, wearing her brother's oxford dress shirt, grey plaid velvet vest and black velvet pants, that Ms Reich's concern bubbled up.
'Her smile exuded joy and confidence and I should have taken that as a sign that we were doing something right,' the mother-of-two said.

Brother and sister: Miguel (left) often let's his sister, Zeca (right) borrow his clothes - like dark blue skinny jeans, Tyrannasaurus Rex T-shirt's and oxford shirts, which she feels most confident in

'I should have felt proud. But I didn’t. I wanted to cry. I wanted to put her in a little pink dress and help her with her tights and buckle her patent leather shoes... I wanted her to look like all the other little girls her age.'
Ms Reich admitted that her disquiet wasn't because she was worried about her daughter 'feeling different,' or being teased, however.
'The truth is that I worried what people would think about me,' she said, before adding: 'We hear it constantly from the media and politicians: Children of queer parents will turn out to be queer themselves. Children without a mother and a father will become confused about gender.'
A few months after her daughter's class picture was taken, a group of parents gathered for dinner and poured over the group photograph.

Like the boys: Vikki Reich, Zeca's mom, explains, 'She covers her messy, short, brown hair with a gray stocking cap and her favorite shoes are high tops that are a vibrant mix of black, blue, yellow and orange'

Ms Reich explained: 'One of the mothers pointed to our daughter, laughed, and said to me, "Did you make her dress like that?!"'
Although Ms Reich would 'never tell her daughter how to dress,' she said other people quickly jump to their own conclusions.
'They don’t know me or my partner or our daughter and assumptions are easy to make,' she said.

Candid: Vikki Reich, a contributing Editor at Lesbian Family, says she wishes she could feel proud at her daughter's confidence

Late at night when Zeca and her son Miguel are asleep, she says she is left alone with her doubts.
She explained: 'In those moments, I am not the outspoken advocate for families like mine. I am not the feminist who defends her children’s rights to express themselves in any way they choose.

'I do not have the luxury of being simply a mother. I am and will always be a lesbian mother.
'The truth is that it was easier when my daughter twirled through the world in skirts... It was easier because I could point to her and say to the world, "See? She is just like every other girl. She is not like me." But that is no longer true.'

But Ms Reich's daughter, deliberate in the way she dresses, continues to remain true to herself - which the mother said, is something to be thankful for.

'My daughter is not a princess and believes that she can be anyone she wants to be. She is happy and loved and kind and compassionate. That is more than enough.'